Granger and I
by Lupin's Mistress
Summary: It's a dull day at work and Draco has decided to indulge himself in allowing his thoughts to rule his day from talking about sound and trees to drugs Draco leads up to the moment he's been trying to figure out Asking his love to marry him DMHG fluff


**Author's Note: **And so I bring forth another one-shot and this is pure humor with a dab of romance...as well as a fluff that I wrote half an hour ago so...I'm just going to say that it isn't amazing or the best thing I've ever written but something completely and utterly random. And, yes, that's it.

**Summary: **It's a dull day at work and Draco has decided to indulge himself in allowing his thoughts to rule his day, from talking about sound and trees to drugs and a night of bliss with Harry Potter, Draco leads up to the moment he's been trying to figure out since the begining. Asking his love to marry him, even if he still hasn't used her first name.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing. I think that about covers it.

**Granger and I**

If a tree falls and no one is there to hear it did it make a sound? Of course not, or at least that is what everyone always said according to some muggle dude that knew this stuff. So, if that were to hold true, then if I screamed and no one were there to hear it would I have really made a sound? I know it's completely illogical because of course I would have heard it and make it a sound but would the saying apply to this regardless? I mean the tree could hear itself fall and heard the loud crash? Trees are alive, right?

So maybe I'm just crazy which isn't that bad of a thought, that would explain why there was a murderous clown in my dream last night and why Hermione Granger keeps glaring at me from her office even though I've done nothing to her. I mean, maybe I did, I've lost track of all my pranks lately and she might have been hurt by one of them, but something in her eyes tells me that isn't it. Maybe she's the crazy one, or—wait a minute, am I wearing a dress again?

Yup. I am.

And she's wearing my clothes. Ah, so that's why she was glaring at me. Seriously, the prank war has got to stop. Maybe getting a job with the Weasley Twins was not the best idea, but it isn't like I need a job, I just needed something to entertain me or my mother would have kicked me out of the house which would have been an interesting development, or she would have sent me to a psychiatrist which would have been worse.

Ah, Granger is here, she's still glaring at me. Have I mentioned that her glares make my stomach feel as if something is floating in it?

"Malfoy, what did you do?"

"Do? I did nothing. I didn't even realize I was wearing your clothes until I looked down a second ago, go blame our wonderful bosses for our trouble, eh?"

She turned to walk away. I stopped her. "Hey, Granger, if I was in the middle of a forest and screamed would it be a sound if no one heard it?"

She regarded me with a strange expression, and then she asked, "What are you on, Malfoy?"

I'm on nothing. Honest. Drugs are icky, well, no, actually they make you feel this floaty feeling that is like amazing and there's like no troubles. The only other time I've felt like that was when I was under the imperious that one time, but still drugs aren't particularly fun the next morning—just like the imperious—I remember the one time I did do them at the insistence of Blaise, great chap, that one, I wound up in bed with this guy, and of course knowing my luck, the man was married—no, I'm not gay!—but anyway, he was married to Ginny Weasley—I hear they're divorced now and he's dating her brother…now there's an interesting story to tell the kids—and happened to be the savior of the wizarding world. Yes, I slept with Harry Potter though I have no recollection of the night. I do take pride in knowing that Potter still has a crush on me.

I guess I was smiling or something because Granger was looking at me with this odd expression. "I don't want to know what is going on inside that head of yours Malfoy," she said.

"Gay encounters after getting high," I told her. "Obviously I don't remember but I do think Harry had a big—" Her hand muffled the rest of my sentence, and then she was calling the bosses.

"I think he's on something? Just, look at him," She said.

Granger's quite pretty in her own way and when she glared at me she looked even better. She has these amazing eyes, maybe that's why I like her glares, which just show you into her heart, they're so deep I could probably get lost in them and of course then where would the world be with the great Draco Malfoy living in Hermione Granger's eyes. Then there's her hair. It's a mess, no, seriously, if I ever tried to put my hands through it I would probably lose them but she's been working on her hair and it looks better, maybe it's the fact that she's grown it out and the weight helps keep it from being a completely bushy mess, but I appreciate her hair, unlike her last boyfriend.

Ronald Weasley made probably the biggest mistake in his life when he cheated on Granger with—of all people—Lavender Brown, and of course after some ill timed comments on her hair moments after she found out good old Granger blew up at the Weasel and they were history. That's when I found her. Have I not mentioned that I'm dating her? I should have, really, but our relationship is an interesting one. Love and hate some would say but it isn't at all like that.

"Malfoy!"

I looked up. She was glaring again. I smiled my most innocent smile and watched the glare recede.

"What is wrong with you?" She asked.

"Hmm, nothing," I told her. And it's true. Really, it's nothing.

I've just been freaking out over how to ask her to marry me. I mean we don't even call each other by our first names and we've been dating for a year, but that is what makes us great together.

"Fred and George said we could have the day off," She told me. "They figure it's too hot for us to be in here, and I was thinking we could go out to lunch and then shopping."

I nodded, watching her gesture with her hands and as she continued talking to me about something that I wasn't really paying attention to I grabbed her by the hands and pulled her to my lap. She squealed but smiled when I kissed her.

I could kiss her until the end of the world I would still not get enough of her, she's that amazing.

"Come on then, Malfoy, we should get out of here before they decided they need us."

I reluctantly let her stand up and stood up, but before she could walk out the door and I pulled her to my chest. "First, my darling Granger, we have to exchange clothes. I am not walking out of here with a dress again."

The last time I had worn a dress was to prove that I wasn't just messing with her when I asked her to go out with me. She had made me wear it all day and night, the next night we went out and she discovered that I was serious about her. I mean she was beautiful and smart and simply put the greatest thing that could have happened to me.

It's strange to think back to when Hermione and I were enemies, back during school but now I can't get enough of her and I can't not be close to her. I love her.

"So what were you on about before, about screaming and sound?" She asked suddenly, as she dragged me to the door.

"Ah, that," I said. "Well. I had a thought the other day, as I tend to do, but mostly because I'd been teasing Potter with my amazing arse earlier and he made a comment about trees and sound. According to some muggle if a tree fell in the middle of a forest and no one heard it, it wouldn't be a sound. So then I started to wonder, if I screamed and no one heard it, would that be a sound."

Granger gave me a look that clearly told me to not waste her time with such trivial nonsense.

"But the thing is," I continued as practiced earlier. "I would never be alone in the middle of a forest just standing there screaming. One: I would never have a good reason for going into a forest. Two: I would never have a good reason for screaming in the middle of a forest. Three: If I ever went to a forest to scream I would most likely drag you to come with me. Four: Well, there isn't a number four but do you want to know the reason why I would never go into a forest alone?"

Granger shook her head.

"Well," And this was the moment, I couldn't mess it up like I always messed up everything. "Because, Granger, I love you and I doubt with you in my life I would ever have a reason to scream in the middle of a forest—well, maybe to see if it actually was a sound, but you know I don't like science—and just because it isn't your birthday, and it isn't my birthday, and it isn't Christmas, and it isn't valentine's day, or any other stupid holiday out there I just want to say, will you marry me?

"Now, hear me out, will you? There are like a thousand and one reasons why you shouldn't but there is only one reason why you should, and that is that I look amazing in leather pants, so, Granger, what do you say? Will you be my wife?"

And so she kissed me.

I could hear Fred and George clapping and shouting out things but I ignored them. Instead I kissed her.

"I love you, Granger," I told her when I pulled away, a man needs air, after all.

"You do know that after we're married you can't call me Granger, right?"

I grinned. "Oh, I've thought about that, too. When we get your last name changed to Malfoy, we could change your first to Granger, makes it easier for me, you know."

She hit me but was laughing.

"Fine, then," I said. "I love you, Hermione."

She smiled. "And I love you, Draco."

And they—I mean we—lived happily ever after. Maybe

**Author's Note: **So, hopefully you've all enjoyed this. This was simply for fun so any response is appreviated it. I love Draco and Hermione ships but haven't really written long fics about it like other pairings...so this is a first in a while...and just I hope someone enjoyed this. Please review.


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